Random Tuesdayness - The One Where I Tell You About Joe the Drummer

Welcome to Tuesday and all its Randomocity. Is that even a word? I don't care if it's not. It's my blog, so I can say what I want. Anyway... Random Tuesday Thoughts is Keely's baby and I love participating every week. Grab all the random shit floating around in your brain and throw it into a post. Or just spatter on about anything and everything that comes to mind. Or bitch and complain about a recent date you went on... whatever works.


Most of you know I went on a date last night. Let me tell you about the dude really fast. I told you yesterday that we met online. He was first to contact me. We texted back and forth all day yesterday and he said he wanted to see me. I told him we should meet for coffee. We agreed on 7:30 at Starbucks. Public place. Neutral ground. In between both of our houses. I went home, showered, put on my potions and lotions and spruced up my makeup. I wore my cute new white, flowy top, my new jeans, and my sexy shoes I showed you last week. He said he liked heels so I thought I'd indulge him. Why I go the extra mile, I'll never know. I got to Starbucks around 7:15. I have this thing where I like to arrive a bit early to a first meeting so I'm not the one looking awkward walking in and deciding how to greet my date. As soon as I pulled in the parking lot I got a text from him asking if we could push back to 8 PM. Ok, fine, no biggie. I grabbed a chai and tore into my book. (I rarely travel anywhere without a book anymore.) Around 7:55 I get a call from him to tell me he's on his way and he doesn't want me to think he's ditching me. He pulled in at 8:15. Walked in. And planted one full on my lips. With tongue. No, I'm not kidding.

We sat and talked... he kissed me a few more times. Nice lips, so I wasn't complaining. But then I started getting suspicious, as I'm wont to do. Not all of his stories were adding up. And I made a mental note of it. He asked if I wanted to go back to his place and watch a movie. I said I was sorry but I had to get up early for work in the morning. He then asked if we could go take a walk around Murray Park. Ok, it was dark outside. Murray Park is one of the last places I'd like to be in the dark with someone I just met. My fellow Utahns will attest to the fact it's not a place you go after dark with someone you don't know. Plus I was in 3 inch heels. Hello!? Anyone home? I'm not going for a walk in those! And plus, do you have to be an idiot to ask someone you just met to go walk around in a park after dark in heels. Duh!We left at 9:30 when Starbucks closed. He walked me to my car. By the way, he kissed me every chance he got...and that didn't change when we got out to my car. So we stood there for a minutes, making out in the parking lot on the corner of 5800 South and State street. If any of you drove by, I'm sorry. I'm not much of one for PDA. In fact, someone stopped at the light hollered over at us "Woo hoo! Yeah! Get some!" I promptly sat down in my car. I was totally embarrassed. We said goodbye and went our separate ways. He texted me later on. Nothing too exciting.

I started thinking some more and really started to doubt everything he'd said to me. Remember Joe the Bartender? Yeah... I have a hard time believing anything anyone tells me anymore (unless of course I already know I can trust you). I looked up the drum shop where Joe the Drummer said he taught lessons, and I found their page on Facebook. His name was NOT listed on there as one of their teachers. After that I wrote an e-mail to the girls telling them how the date went and about my suspicions that he's a fraud.

My good friend Jen (who you may remember from San Fran last year) forwarded it on to her boyfriend (who's name is also Joe, but is on the approved list) for a straight man's point of view. He then proceeded to do me a really big favor. He called the drum shop... and guess what? They've never heard of the guy. He's not on any of their lists. Am I surprised? Nope! Not at all. Apparently I look like I can be easily decieved.

I think he thinks, "Oh hey...here's this girl who's not too bad looking, and overweight, so she probably has some self-esteem issues. I think I'll try to make her like me, manipulate the hell out of her, and then take her for a ride." Guess what, Joe? If that's even your name... I'm not as dumb as I look. You're the asshole. I'm not going to be decieved by you, or anyone else, for that matter. (I flat out told him last night that I no longer implicitly trust people and that if you're someone new in my life, you have to earn my trust. I'm no longer doling it out!) So go to hell you fucking asshole. I don't need you, or anyone like you in my life.

Now that I got that off my chest.... Some gratuitous pics of Mr. Hottness himself for your viewing pleasure...

Oh, and by the way... because of the aforementioned asshole, I only got about 4.5 hours of sleep last night. This is following him waking me up yesterday morning at 6:17 with a text. Jackass!

Moving right along.... I went to Auri's house after my "date" to pick up my "package" in every form of the word! We chatted for a while about my date while she washed her face and got ready for bed. She was complaining that her eyebrows were getting scary and asked if I'd do some maintenance for her. The next thing that came out of her mouth was "Me pluck you long time?!" We cracked up and decided that needed to go on the blog. We headed downstairs so I could do the eyebrow grooming, and open my present. Her eyebrows are now gorgeous.

I was very excited to open my package. After I opened it, Auri and I proceeded to compare our glass "friends" side-by-side. I told her I loved her for the fact that we could do that and not think it was weird.

My *prize* is very cute. It's pink glass with little white nubby hearts on it. If you go to Eden Fantasys and click on the link for glass toys, you can see all they have to offer. Mine is called the 'glass wand with hearts' if that helps you find it. I'd put it on here but I'm at work and am not going to look it up and find the exact address for you. It has yet to be used, but I'll let y'all know how I like it after it's inaugural flight... *wink wink*

And my mom is making me cook dinner tonight. Not looking forward to it. But I'm making something yummy, so hopefully it turns out!

So, to conclude, what are the lessons we've learned from this experience?

~Guys named Joe (that are not already living with my friend Jen) are all assholes.

~Glass toys are fun (I think)

~Dating sucks, but I'm sticking with it.

~I still feel uncomfortable making out in public.