Random Tuesdayness - Boobs, PMS, Singing, Dancing and Having Babies

Boobs. Tatas. Knockers. Have you ever had a "bad boob" day? Like, where you look in the mirror and realize all the flaws with your girls? I had never had one until a few weeks ago. It was kind of strange. I think I'd be more satisfied with mine if I felt I was more in proportion. I've got pretty small knockers compared to the size of my ass. I hate when men have PMS. Seriously. I'm the one with the uterus and ovaries. I'm the one that has to have a period every 24 effing days. I'm the one who has to deal with whacked out hormones. Men shouldn't be allowed to have PMS. Period.If there was one talent I wish I'd been born with, it would definitely be the ability to sing. I love to sing. Love. It. Seeing how I've been told by more than one person that I've got a horrid voice, I try not to do it in public too often. However, if I'm alone in my car, you can bet your ass I've got the music cranked and am singing at the top of my lungs. I want nothing more right now than to get married. If I were able to quit my job, maybe have a baby or two and be a stay-at-home mom, I'd be the HAPPIEST girl in the world. Bet you never thought you'd hear that out of my mouth, huh?I miss dancing like crazy. Like. Crazy. I'd love to get back into it but am not really sure where to start. Everytime I watch people dancing on TV, I can't help but to totally get into it. My body tenses up and I get all excited! I know that RDT offers community classes in SLC so I guess that's where I'll start! Wish me luck! (That's Heather Morris - Brittany on Glee - and she is one of the most amazing dancers I've ever seen! I also may or may not have a girl crush on her...)
Ms. Salti
P.S. Someone... and I'm not mentioning names... *cough* Cassi *cough* ... was supposed to make me a new signature and still hasn't finished it...

Getting Naked {or Gettin' Nekkid (depending on what part of the country you're from)}

I brought up the subject of being naked in a conversation the other day and was thoroughly surprised by the response I got. As I'm typing this, the conversation is coming back to me. I was on the phone with the cute boy and he asked me to look up a musician for him. This particular musician's hit song was called Dancing Naked in the Rain, or something like that, and it prompted me to ask him if he'd ever danced naked in the rain.

I believe his response was something to the effect of -unless I'm showering, the most naked I usually get is down to my boxers. Wha-Whaaat???

This kind of surprised me... a lot of men I know like to be naked as much as possible, whether it be just hanging around the house, or anywhere they can get away with it!

We're a culture that doesn't necessarily promote the shedding of clothes but we all do it every once in a while. This got me thinking and I thought I'd ask y'all a few questions...in return, I'll share my answers with you:

1. Do you enjoy being naked?
2. Have you ever cleaned the house naked?
3. Ever danced naked in the rain?
4. Ever been skinny dipping?
5. Ever flashed a random stranger?
6. Ever ran around the desert naked?

Now, my answers:
1. Absolutely
2. All the time (as long as I'm the only one home)
3. Twice (but was only entirely naked from the waist up)
4. Yes, as often as possible
5. Yes, but from a distance
6. Twice (but only entirely naked from the waist up)
If you want more info than that, you'll have to ask specifics!

So, now it's your turn to tell me your answers... I'm dying to know!

A Few of My Favorites From Last Weekend...

Since I can't seem to muster up the energy to write a friggin' post, I'm giving you a preview of the soon-to-be-coming posts next week. Here is a handful of some of my favorite shots, that may or may not be slightly compromising of my friends!

I.LOVE.THIS.GIRL!!! THAT IS ALL.

Workin' the pole! Oh yeah!

Come hither, young man...


Really, it's better not to ask...

Dancin' all up on Odum. Damn, he's packin'!

What the fuck, maynard?

Oooh, baby!

Hell yeah, girls!!!

And with that, have a fantabulous weekend and you'll get the lowdown on Vegas all next week!

Dancing Queens

I'll admit it... I've been slacking in the picture-taking department... as well as slacking in the blogging department. As such, I've got a few posts and lots of pictures from the past few weekends backing up. Two weekends ago, over Labor Day to be exact, we celebrated my friend Toni's b-day by going dancing at Habits. {Habits is the old Rascals, which, for those of you outside of Utah, was the only male strip club in Salt Lake back in the day.} Do y'all know how long it had been since I've gone dancing? A damn long time, that's how long!Noelle, Toni and I took a tricked-out cab to the bar and the lovely Misses Jen & Rosiemarie, drove our drunk asses home! Can I just tell you how sore I was the day after? Whew! I danced my ass off!
Noelle and Jen hamming it up for the camera!

This is Jen and her friend Bonnie (I tried to get her to smile, all to no avail!)

We decided we all needed to blow off a bit of steam after last week, so we ended up going dancing again on Friday night. The nice thing about this bar is that it houses a slightly older crowd... and by slightly older I mean my age group and up... Plus, it's not a meat market and that is sooo welcoming! Lisa and Noelle deny the fact that they color coordinated, but I know the truth.
That's Toni's finger in the back... I think she was dancing, not giving me bunny ears!

I hope you guys all had great weekends as well and I'll be back with more pics and stories to share!

P.S. I may or may not have guest blogged over on Cassi's blog last week...

SYTYCD, OMG!

Aurs came over last night and we watched So You Think You Can Dance. We watched all the dances from last week (oh, the pleasure of TiVo) and a few of my favorite moments from a couple other episodes. Last week's show was amazing, as was this week's, and I'm nervous to see who gets kicked off tonight.

Kayla and Kupono's piece from last week honestly made me cry. It was amazing. Mia Michaels choreographed it and the music was Sara Bareilles' song Gravity. Wow. Wow... This was their dance from the previous week choreographed by Sonya Tayeh to Blue Foundation's song Eyes on Fire (from the Twilight soundtrack).... kind of a vampire-esque number. Loved it! And I love the two of them as a couple!

In the beginning, I didn't really like Melissa all that much... she's definitely grown on me over the weeks. And Ade is just awesome!Initially I was bummed that Philip got booted, but after seeing Jeanine and Jason's dance last night, I couldn't be happier. Their partners (Philip and Caitlin who both got sent home last week) were holding them back. Together, they're unbelievable! I couldn't find a pic of them from last night, sorry! My friend Candace and I were IM'ing each other while watching it last night... we were all a little emotional after watching them dance!

Evan and Randi's "Butt Dance" was sooo unbelievably cute. It was choreographed by Mia, but I can't remember the song she used. I loved it!

Brandon and Janette are absolutely amazing together. I'm sad they're not partners anymore, but they're both so great as individuals, I think I'll get over it.

This number was so much fun! Rock 'n' Roll vs. Hip Hop!

And their Cha-Cha was on fire!

I hope the tour comes to Salt Lake again this year.... I'm definitely going this time!

Drinking and Debauchery

***Seriously... what the hell? I posted this like 5 hours ago and it's still not showing up on the "Blogs I'm Following" roll. It's pissing me off!!!!!***

This last weekend was dubbed "Brittany's Weekend," or if you're Rose it was "Brittany, Brittany, Brittany!" She has some selfishness issues she needs to deal with. Anyway... Saturday was Brittany's Bachelorette Day. Her sister Jaimee (who is her matron of honor) was in charge of getting it all set up, and decided that the day would start off at the spa for some pampering, and would conclude by consuming copious amounts of alcohol. I don't think anyone had a problem with any part of it!We went to a spa called the Kura Door which is a Japanese inspired spa in the avenues downtown. It's a very tranquil spa equipped with a nice locker room, robes, a fabulous sitting area and a meditation room. They also have a regular and a dry sauna for guests to use before and/or after treatments. I got there a bit too late to use them but I hear they're great. And other than one of the girls in our party being way too loud (one of the attendants had to come back and tell the group to keep it down) it was very relaxing. I got a facial that was divine, and everyone else really enjoyed their treatments too!After the spa we all went our separate ways and were to meet up later (either at my house to pre-game) or at the Bayou. We didn't end up having time to pre-game, so Brittany headed downtown, ride compliments of her mum, to wait for everyone's arrival. Jessica picked me up and then we swung by Noelle's to grab her before heading to the bar. We met Rose in the parking lot and headed inside, only to look at my phone and realize the group had headed to another bar because the Bayou was too crowded. The night before, Jaimee had mentioned going to the Circle Lounge instead of the Bayou because of the dancing. None of the girls in the group I came with were particularly excited about going to a dance club/bar. It's not really our scene and we weren't sure we'd have a good time. When we got there, we were the only people inside. Granted, it was only 8:30, but come on. The rest of the party had gotten there before us (because we didn't get the memo and were at the Bayou, and may or may not have been drinking from a to-go cup in the parking lot for 10 minutes before walking inside) so they had scored a big loungy area in the back corner for us all. And to top it off, they scored us the best cocktail server in the place. Not that we knew this beforehand, but she rocked and made our night!The Circle Lounge has a food menu, but it's all sushi, and I don't do sushi. I ordered some tempura veggies and a chicken salad. The veggies were great, but the chicken on my salad wasn't done. What is it with Japanese food establishments not cooking the chicken enough? Do they think that since people like to eat raw fish, they also enjoy raw chicken? Whatevs!Apparently the sushi was great, and it was cheap, too. I guess as long as everyone else was happy, I can get over it. The drinks weren't too expensive either, so that made for a very inexpensive and enjoyable evening. Too bad we didn't know that earlier... some of us may have downed a few more cocktails!Earlier in the day, I had stopped by the Blue Boutique to get some fun/naughty gifts for Brittany. Yes, I had gotten her a nightie for the shower, but I wanted to get her some dirty stuff for the Bachelorette party! The Blue Boutique is one of our local lingerie boutique/adult novelty stores and it's great. They have a huge selection of everything and I spent way too much time trying to decide what to buy. I ended up getting her a really cute pair of while, lacey, ruffled boy shorts/cheeky pants with hot pink garters. (Was that visual enough?) I also got her some white thigh-highs to go with it which she can also use with her cute bustier set that Kasian gave her. I also got her a bottle of lube (Gun Oil - it's awesome), some flavored condoms, a glow-in-the-dark condom, and some banana-flavored stuff for doing *ahem* stuff. Oh, and a box of "mints" that have benzocaine in them, if you catch my drift. I think she liked the gifts, and I'm sure that Paul will, too!

After we ate, we had a few more shots and talked and laughed and danced. We all had a round of raspberry kamikaze shots that were pretty good. I'm not a raspberry fan, but they were doable. After that we had a round of chocolate cake shots. I guess they're made with Frangelico (hazelnut liqueur) and vodka... first you lick the sugar off a slice of lemon, then you shoot the alcohol, and then bite the slice of lemon, and it tastes like chocolate cake. Pretty good, except at the end, all I tasted was lemon. Oh well!The rest of the night was spent drinking more, dancing more, and lounging around. We made friends with a couple that came and sat with us. He was from New Zealand and I guess she was from here. Very cute couple, but apparently they weren't together. Brittany spent a lot of time talking with them while the rest of us admired her boobies. They were perfect... purchased... but perfect! We were all insanely jealous!Speaking of boobies... apparently Jaimee (who is married with children) likes "pillows," and so she spent a large amount of time that night resting on Noelle's. After she discovered that Noelle's cleavage smelled so great, she invited everyone in the bar over to smell it. That's when Jason, the crazy boy in the pink polo shirt came to hang out with us. We all thought he was gay. Apparently, he's not aware of that fact yet. Oh, so young and innocent... and in denial!I was pretty shocked that all of us (except for Rose and her bum knee) got out on the dance floor! I didn't last too long because I was too hot (hence my original avoidance of going dancing in the first place) but we got out there in spurts. Even Jessica danced a bit... I'm so proud! By about 1 AM we'd all hit a wall and decided to head out. Tracie, Abbie and Jenn left to go back to their hotel (as they drove down from Ogden) and Noelle, Rose, Jessica and I headed out as well. We were all hungry after hours of dancing, drinking and not eating real food, so we headed to the VI for some late night/early morning grub. Thank God, Jessica doesn't drink and she was our DD. She's an angel!After VI, we took Rose back to her car (yes she was fine to drive - quit drinking 5 hours earlier) and we headed back to Noelle's. Jessica and I dropped her off and then headed for my house. I didn't get home until almost 3 which is rare for me, and even more rare for Jessica. We used to have this joke that if we hung out on the weekends, we couldn't go home before 11 PM so we couldn't be considered old bitties! I think we hit our goal Saturday night! By the next morning Brittany, Jaimee, Noelle, Rose, Jessica (obviously as she didn't drink) and I were all fine. Apparently Tracie, Jenn and Abbie were worse for wear. I'll have to talk to them at the wedding this weekend and see how they fared. I'm just glad I wasn't in their shoes. So not fun! So that was the Weekend of Brittany. I hope she enjoyed it as much as I did, and I can't wait for the wedding this weekend!

I'm A Little Teapot... DWTS On Tour!

I grew up dancing. I remember watching Solid Gold with my mom in the very early '80s and trying to dance like the people on TV did. My mom recognized the joy this brought me and enrolled me in the beginner ballet/tap class at the local dance studio. From ballet and tap I moved onto Jazz, and considered myself a jazz dancer until I got to junior high. From there I started branching out into contemporary and hip hop, and eventually danced on the 9th grade dance company at my school. (I felt very priveleged to be part of it!) After that, I danced for one year in high school at a private studio and then gave it up to focus on school. To this day, I wish I had kept up with it. Someday, maybe I'll venture back.
Anywho... with all the new dancing shows on TV I've been pacified for now. My favorite is "So You Think You Can Dance(SYTYCD)," and my second favorite is "Dancing With The Stars (DWTS)." The DWTS on Tour came through Salt Lake at the end of December and my dad got tickets for us to go. When I say us, I mean my grandparents, me and a guest of my choice, which of course, was Auri. Unfortunately, the guy who got the tickets for my dad got fired the month before and we were only able to get 2 tickets, so I ended up going on a date with Nana.

About ten minutes into the show I remembered I had my camera with me, so I started taking pictures. I then remembered my camera has video capability, so I grabbed some video of the performances. The video is down at the bottom of this post. It's about 3 minutes long, I think.

So, the first picture is of Cheryl and Maurice. The second picyure is of four of the couples... I think it was Cheryl, Edyta, Marlee Matlin and Tony Braxton. The picture directly above is the end of one of the group dances and you can see just about all of them.

This was one of my favorite dances. Lance Bass was the main character and he was surrounded by Lacey Schwimmer, Kim Johnson, Edyta, and Cheryl Burke. It was a cute little number... very entertaining. He was the center of attention and all the girls wanted him. Not too far from his everyday life, I'm sure. Too bad he's gay!

This is the shot at the end when they're walking toward him on the chair. See if you can click on the pics to see them bigger or more clearly. If not, I'll email them to you. Oh, and watch the video below.... it's adorable!